Be Empowered By Your Divorce

I used to use that phrase a lot ‘be empowered by your divorce’.  Then I received a phone call from someone who said ‘fancy empowering people through their divorce, that’s disgusting’ (his words).  I didn’t really have a reply because I was caught off guard a bit by the word, disgusting.  So I got thinking, ok, maybe I need to get clear and explain exactly what that term means.  But let me start by saying what it doesn’t mean first.

Being empowered by your divorce does not mean that you try and become powerful, or over powering or heaven forbid, controlling.  It does not mean that you become a nasty or vindictive person.  It is quite the opposite really.

My Top 9 Tips on How To Be Empowered By Your Divorce

Being empowered by your divorce means :

1. You choose not to have a pity party

2. You choose to become a better version of you and not a bitter one

3. You make choices that are proactive rather than reactive

4. You choose to look at your marriage as having served a purpose and be grateful for all the good it bought you

5. You choose to look forward rather than dwell in the past

6. You choose to learn the lessons it taught you

7. You learn to forgive your ex

8. You learn to let go and

9. You choose every day to be happy


So, to be empowered by your divorce is a courageous move.  It takes practicing new ways of thinking that serve a much higher purpose.  You may not get how to do this straight away.  I found it challenging, but it certainly was easier to start being grateful every day for all that I had in the marriage. As well as all that I had by having a fresh start.  I’d like to know who wrote the rule book that says otherwise though, that says you have to be bitter and twisted, try and get back at the other person all the time.  Play the victim for whatever reason.  Who wrote those rules?  So why  not choose to ask better questions of yourself and be courageous.  To be empowered by your divorce sure looks a lot prettier than walking around with a sour look on your face.

Maybe that person will read this blog, and maybe they wont.  Maybe you now have a better idea what being empowered by your divorce really means.

What will you choose?

See you on the flip side, Ren

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